I want to say around the age of 13, I started living with my dad. I wanted to get out of my hometown and just start anew elsewhere. Plus...my mother and I didn't really get along during that time. When she would get upset with me she would always say things like "I'm tired of looking at your black ass!", or "Get your black ass out my face!". Everything she said to me pretty much ended with "Black Ass", that I almost thought it was my name. For the record my mother and I are cool as a fan, but if we sat and talked about this she would swear that she never called me things like that. What we choose to forget!
Anyway...after the summer I was going to be attending Lakeview High School in Garland, Texas. Being from Oklahoma City...everyone dressed different, the slang was way over my head at first, it was just all new to me. I spent the entire summer hanging out with guys who lived around my way, so I caught on pretty fast. I remember this girl who lived a couple of doors down from me. I wont say her name, but MAAAAAANNNNN!!!! She was so fine! A true Yellow Hammer (Word to Roc D and K-Cold/Fresh Roc Productions). Light skin, with the Oaktown 357 hairstyle! She ran track so her body was BLAH-DOW-POWWW!!! When she came outside it was like time would slow down just a bit so you could notice every feature of that girl. Then her older bother would yell out "Get your ass in the house!", and all went back to being a regular ass day.
Never in a million years could I get my courage up to say something to that girl. Hell up to that point all the girls in Oklahoma City let me know that I was too black to even talk to them ,(except for this white girl I dated my whole 8th grade year). So I had little to no confidence at that point. Then she told one of the guys I use to hang around that she wanted me to approach her. I thought it was a fucking joke! Took me a few days, but yeah....she was feeling ALL THIS CHOCOLATE over here! Shortly after connecting with her it was late night phone calls, taking the trash out just to meet her by the dumpster without her brother interfering, all that! Had a run in with her ex at the end of the summer, but all in all it was great being liked by "one of the finest girls in the hood".
Then school started...the worst first day of my life! These two females who had lockers next to mine told me how black and ugly I was in three different languages damn near! The guys at that school sound like my mother when they would call my attention like, "Say black ass boy, let me hold a dollar!". I couldn't go one day without being called out of my name. Amongst all that....my Yellow Hammer summer fling began to act as if she didn't know me. I could not talk to her in that hallway, or make any kind of eye contact with her. After school though...when no one was around...oh I was her black teddy bear. She had no problem showing affection then! But between the hours of 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. (not including after school activities), it was a no go! About halfway through my 9th grade year I became immune to the insults. I would let things build til out of nowhere someone came a joking and my hand came a swinging!
Then I met a young lady who we will call Ms. B, who came from Virginia. I don't know what it is about women from Virginia but they have this glow surrounding them I swear. Like....the dark skin women from Virginia have this super smooth skin that just shines! Look at Tweet (Oops Oh My)! Ms. B was nothing short of that. Finally I was with someone who wasn't afraid to kiss me in public. Someone who let it be known to the school that she was with me. Oh how all them light skin niggas wanted to get with Ms. B! So I guess to show hatred that they didn't like to see us together...they would say shit like, "Ya'll better not ever have a baby, cause that baby gonna be black as hell!", or "Man what does she see in your extra black ass cause you black as-e-muthafuckah.". Hahahahahahahahahaha, whatever it was she sure didn't see it in you little boy. And the hatred my summer fling Yellow Hammer developed was GGGGGGGGGREAT!!! That following summer she got to see me and Ms. B parade around my apartment complex like a true teenage love. Calling my phone asking how are me and Ms. B are doing...bitch you see it!!!
So I want to hear from the ladies on this one. In your younger days did you have a stigma against the darker or lighter shade of boys? And why so? I am sure we are all much older, and mature at this point. But why do we not see black for what it is? Why should skin tone depict our mates? (This applies to men as well, for I am known to date women from all shades of the sun....I crave you light skin sistas for some reason!)
#blackonblackonblack #beautifulskin #imjusttrynnahelpyopunkass
P.S. follow me on twitter @blackteedaily
No comments:
Post a Comment